Now I could be stereotyping and you could disagree, but as a girl I think your friendships fall into one of three categories.
1) You're a guys girl
-You proclaim on the regular that "you would rather hang out with guys" or "you have way more guy friends than girl friends". I'm going to go ahead and say you're not a two bit hussy and you just prefer to have friendships that are low maintenance and drama free. That's how it is with most guys, no drama. Just be careful that they try and get in your pants, which is bound to happen. Because I know that all of you reading this are of the super hott body variety, you're here so you're obviously fabulous.
2) You have a small tight knit group of friends
-Most of your girl friends have probably been in your life for ten or more years, minus the few you picked up in college or at the work place. Y'all move as a pack and rarely have one on one dates, it usally all or nothing. You always have someone on speed dial to grab a cocktail or go see a movie. Your bridesmaids have been picked out since before you met your fiance. And you should consider yourself pretty lucky in the friends department.
3) You tend to stick to yourself
-You may have one or two best friends, not including your significant other who you definitely claim as your "best friend and the only one you need", and you have a handful of nice acquaintances. People you would strike up conversation with at the mall or might even grab a drink with on occasions, but they aren't the kind of people that you share your deepest secrets with.
I, myself, fall into group three. I have a best friend that lives in Texas, two cousins that I consider my best friends, and a few other close friends. I have 2 bloggy friends that I know I would be joined at the hip with if we lived in the same state. I proudly claim S & BK as my soul mates. Sometimes I dont have someone to see a chick flick with me or to catch happy hour when I need it, but honestly I'm ok with that. I'm happy and thankful for what I do have. I find that navigating relationships with girls is tricky. Maybe I'm just weary from my run-ins with the mean girls in high school and college. I could probably put myself out there a little more, but where do you even find friends as an adult? It's not like I'm in class to meet new people every semester, I almost always have a mini me attached to my hip, and I enjoy spending most nights cuddled on the couch with my mister. Not that I wouldnt enjoy expanding my friendship circle, but I'm pretty comfortable in my life.
What about you? What's your friendship situation?
I used to be in group 1 early on because the only girls in my youth group around my age weren't very friendly and the other ones were older and intimidating. Now, I'm in between 2 and 3. I have my close group of girlfriends from high school, but they live all over the country. So in Fayetteville, I'm a 3. I've got my hubs as my bf, a really close friend, and a few other semi-close friends. I'm awful at the whole "new friend" deal
ReplyDeleteI am all over the place too. But I have been kind of grappling with the whole friendship thing now too because I had a lot more friends in college, and now I have quite a few less. I love the friends I do have, but I'd like to make some new friends. My cousin suggested meetup.com, which she used when she moved to a new city where she knew no one. I don't have a boyfriend or husband, so my friends and family is what I have. But I also have friends scattered around the country who if I lived in the same state, would hang out constantly. It is a tricky world as an adult!
ReplyDeleteB, you and I are pretty much the same person when it comes to this. Friendships really change once you become a wife and then a mother. You have this little person (or people) that are always around, so of course it's wonderful and at the same time, it causes you not to be able to build on friendships because you're not able to go out as much. I have my husband, my son, and my very best friend who does know some deep secrets of mine who moved away to Texas as well recently and so I know EXACTLY what you mean. I too have some cousins/family I would consider best friends, but honestly, I do not have someone that I can speed-dial for a drink or movie date either. I feel your pain. When you find out the answers to your questions about WHERE to find a friend like that, call me because I'd love to know....
ReplyDeleteI love this post. I used to have more guy friends than girlfriends but that changed in college. I have a few close girlfriends right now and a ton of acquaintances which I have a feeling I need to limit; it's causing too much drama!
ReplyDeleteGIrl... you know I agree with you on this 100%! I am most definitely group 3 too! While I think I need to try and make time for the close friends I do have... plain and simple... I don't trust any of them! I think thats why I dont jump at the chance to hang out with them! I've become really good at just pulling away from people! It's my defense mechanism! I'd rather slowing pull away from someone than have to face them and then be stabbed in the back! I just really can't handle the drama and I really hate that there are "friends" Ive gone over and beyond for but yet they haven't done crap for me, yet they do crap for people who don't even give two shits about them! If you can't value our friendship... I can't value you as a person. It's just how it is! I know you know all too well! Drinks soon ... or a movie?! xoxo!
ReplyDeleteI am in third as well! I have 2 good girl friends that are my best friends along w. my sister
ReplyDeletethen 4 or 5 girl friends that have baby girls same age as Breanna that we occasionally do play-dates and MNO
I would definitely say I was in group 1 throughout high school. Now, although I try to be close with friends, I'd say I'm in group 3. I get frustrated and just give up trying to keep up meaningless friendships.
ReplyDeleteI am definitely in Group 3 as well; however I would like to have more girlfriends. It's just super hard to meet people!
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